So, it's already into the New Year! Many have made resolutions to lose weight, kick bad habits like smoking, nail biting, procrastination, take more time for yourself or family, or maybe even to fix the family finances in some cases. In most cases, we either want to do better, or be better in some way.
Many people by this point have given up or are thinking about it. If you've done either one, don't worry. You don't have to make it to the New Year to try again. In fact, why wait at all?
Your goals are important no matter what age you are or what's going on in your life, let alone what day it is.
How does one measure success? Is it in the type of car you drive? Is it the amount of money you have? Good health? Maybe it's in your relationships with others?
What if I told you that you could be successful in any goal you put forth? You can! Many of us are taught from many different sources to limit our thinking. Some of these sources include family, friends, religion, enemies, teachers, and other people we look up to. Some of the time they mean well, and other times they do not. Add to that, the little and not-so-little negative thoughts we tell ourselves in the midst of fear, seeking approval, and perhaps in the fear of making mistakes, telling ourselves we will never be good enough or strong enough.
It's producing this way of thinking that makes many people so miserable. I mean, why would you even want to try if you and everyone else is telling you you'll fail, or never be good enough? I mean, what's the point? Well, what if I told you the importance of your goals begins with your thought process? Your work from the inside out is the THE MOST important part of the process.
Dreamers are amazing, and the use of their imagination is amazing! However, a dreamer is nothing but a dreamer unless he or she applies action to set it in motion for success. Have you ever wondered how it seems like some people can make anything happen? It's almost like magic where they want something, and "Poof!" it appears!
Personally, I don't believe in luck in the way most people do. I do, however, believe that if you allow your mind and experiences to open up to possibilities, you will begin to see more of, and know when to accept opportunities, help, and guidance when they appear.
How to begin successful thinking:
1. Gratitude: Be grateful for everything you can think of no matter how small, and blessings will seem to fall from the sky by the truckloads. This gives you a better attitude, and better outlook on everything in your life, as well as in others' lives.
2. Self Love: Begin by talking to yourself first the way you want to be treated, beginning with affirmations. Saying things like, "I really love myself." and think about the things that make you unique, special, talented, and/or little things that you like about yourself, and tell yourself about them. It's OK to think highly of yourself no matter who has told you not to. It does not make you snobby, or full of yourself, or conceited to think that you are special. You and others were made from scratch in a very specific way. Be proud of that! People who begin to love themselves often feel an outpouring of love and kindness they can't wait to share with others.
3. Choose your thoughts wisely: YOUR THOUGHTS MATTER! I see this all the time in my practice at Hypnotic Wellness Methods Hypnosis. The first thing clients tell me is what they don't want in their lives or behaviors.
Think of your mind as a computer. You wouldn't go to a computer to type in everything you don't want it to do. Instead you begin programming it by entering key words describing what you want. Your mind is no different. If you looked into a search engine, and entered something you don't want, it would find that key word right away, and give you everything you asked for, all of the information, images, etc... The mind does not recognize negative words like don't. When you tell yourself that you don't want to be shy (for example), you are not only giving yourself the command to be shy, but you're bringing it into focus, and blowing it up to gigantic proportions. Your mind's computer begins imagining the situation, which triggers physical reactions (usually fear, shame, and frustration in most cases). The more you focus on this thing you don't want, the more it becomes the elephant in the room, or worse, you look for new ways to avoid situations all together.
4. Think Positive Words, and Thoughts: Now that you've learned about how the mind programs itself, begin replacing what you don't want first off with what it is you do want. Once you've established and pointed out what it is you really want, begin to program yourself by entering it into your system with positive words. The example used earlier, was "I don't want to be shy." Replace it with one word, "Confident." When you do this, take your mental computer to its search engine where there are images, words of encouragement, reminders of times in your life where you were confident in something you did, or in a situation.
5. Set Goals and Take Action: By setting big goals, and outlining small, achievable goals daily, you will be closer to your goal each day.
Many people give up so easily on their goals because whatever it is, is so big that it seems completely unachievable. If you and a friend look at the top of a mountain and say to yourself every day, "I'm going to climb that mountain over there." Is that goal achievable? It's all achievable. The difference on whether you or your friend get there depends on the action taken. If you're standing there every day looking at the mountain, and dreaming about getting there, ten years down the road, you will probably still be staring at that mountain. Imagine that your friend, however (while you were dreaming), was each day, planning how, visualizing, and actually taking more and more steps to achieving their goal. A dreamer can only get so far, but when you take a dreamer into action, there is nothing they cannot do.
6. Apply Solutional Thinking: The unachievable is only there because of limited thinking. When you begin to apply thoughts of , "What will it take?" "What do I need?" "What do I need to learn?" in place of words like never, can't, impossible, you are setting yourself up for success! Applying solutional thinking to your normal thinking process will not guarantee there will never be issues or mistakes, but will always help you to find more and better solutions to help you to move forward. Each problem carries more than one solution, and there is always a solution. If you don't believe me, think about this: 4+6=10, but so does 5x2, 11-1, 20 divided by 2 ( I could go on, and on, but hopefully you get the picture). This will open up a whole new world, with all sorts of perspectives for you. Tip: If you ever find yourself saying nasty words like can't, never, impossible, or the dreaded words like "I don't want..." Teach yourself (like a computer) to cancel it out. Mentally, or physically say the word, DELETE. You can even imagine yourself pushing a delete button in your mind's eye, and go back to your solutional thinking asking yourself, "What will it take?"
Seems simple, right? It may take some adjustment at first, but remember, repeating an action for 28 days makes it a habit, and I promise it will be worth it!
Nicole Jeffries is a certified consulting hypnotist, and director of Hypnotic Wellness Methods Hypnosis. She is a devoted wife, and mother of three who takes great pleasure in helping others. She has helped countless people with personal issues, redirecting unwanted behaviors, as well as providing guidance through developing a better quality of life. She has a passion for helping others, as well as a passion for learning, meditation, nutrition, natural healing. spiritualism and teaching others about personal growth.